Saturday, April 14, 2012

Dear Mia...

Dear Mia,

Was the last time I wrote here really when you were only 6 weeks old?? And now you're 6 MONTHS old?? I could apologize endlessly but the fact is, you and your sisters have made me one busy little mama. I guess it doesn't really matter though how long it's been, right? What matters is that I'm here now and I have sooo much to say to you.

Even though I'm just now writing this letter to you let me tell you that I've been writing it in my head for months. Every time you do something new and every morning I get you out of bed and you look like you've grown over night I try desperately to freeze those moments in my mind. I try to convince myself that I'll remember everything but that gets tougher and tougher every day. I hold you close, shut my eyes, and it's like we just met yesterday. But we didn't meet yesterday. We've had 6.5 beautiful months with you already. So in an effort to freeze time I want to tell you all about you in these last 6 months.

You are incredibly sweet. And I mean incredibly sweet. When your sisters were babies I found that each of them could be summed up almost completely in a word. Ana was an "angel". She slept, ate, behaved like an angel. Maddie was utterly "happy". She made me and everyone around her incredibly happy. And you, my sweet sweet girl, are just that - incredibly "sweet". You can be so quiet but are always paying attention. You smile at everyone that has the pleasure of looking your way. And that smile, oh that smile, it will turn even the grumpiest person into a pile of giddy mush. Sometimes you smile with your entire body - arms go up, legs kick out, and you're big ol' eyes get so squinty they almost close. And sometimes, which are Mommy's favorites, you give just the faintest little smirk that makes you appear so much older than your 6 little months.

And while you are certainly the sweetest, let me tell you, baby, that when you are unhappy about something - anything - you don't shy away from letting us know. In fact, I think you're convinced that you not only have to let us know there's something wrong but you must scream it at the top of your lungs. You can go from your sweet, calm little self to quite the demanding little girl in a matter of seconds. But even then your cuteness doesn't fade in the least bit. Because as quickly as you get upset it's never anything a simply hug and smooch can't just as quickly fix.

You've been my worst sleeper :). That said, any baby book would still put you in the "great sleeper" category for sure. Your sisters spoiled me by sleeping 12 hours through the night very early on and, though you were sleeping 7 hours straight by 3 months, it wasn't until 5 months that you gave me the 12 hours. With that you brought a patience to my heart that wasn't there before. We're a family of sleepers and going over 6 months without a solid 8 hours of sleep wore on me. But each night, as I would nurse you back to sleep after you inevitably woke up between 3 and 4, with heavy eyes and tired arms, I would sink into your rocking chair and just watch you. I would watch you nurse and then drift back to sleep. Most nights I would sit with you long after you were already asleep just to hold you and have it be just you and me (something we don't get much around here :).

Speaking of...let's talk about your big sisters. They love to dance and sing and yell and run. And they LOVE to do all of that for you :). In fact, there is nothing those two little girls wouldn't do for a chance to see you smile at them. And smile you do! Maddie can crack you up like no one else. She dances and makes funny faces that you apparently find hi-larious. Pretty much anything Maddie does makes you laugh. You love to watch her and I swear I can see you taking mental notes on how to entertain. I have a feeling that the two of you are going to be putting on some pretty fun shows in the future and getting into your share of trouble together :).

And then there's Ana...oh Ana. You and her have already developed the sweetest little relationship. When she walks into a room you light up. You love to watch her and listen to her voice. Your relationship with her is the first one I really noticed. From very early on you were smitten with her. And vice versa all the way. She ADORES you, sweetpea. Like nobody's business. She calls you "our baby" because to her you're not her sister, you're her baby. She says things like "I feel like I've waited my whole life for this baby" and "Mia! You need to stop with all of this cuteness because I just cannot handle it!" Yeah, she's a pretty sweet and funny one.

Now let's talk about what I don't want to forget and you're sure to want to know:
  • your first smile came on the day you turn 1 month
  • your first giggle happened just a couple weeks later as I was kissing your sweet chin
  • from your very first giggles you started getting the hiccups every time you laugh and I LOVE it! It is, hands down, one of the cutest things everrrrr!
  • by 3 months you were sleeping 7 hrs at night
  • at 3 months you rolled all the way over
  • at 4 months you could find your pacifier in your crib and put it back in your mouth (something that doesn't "normally" happen until 8 months)

  • at 4.5 months you started sitting up
  • at 5 months you started sleeping 12 hours through the night
  • just after you turned 5 months you reached for me for the first time {looooove}
  • at 6 months you started giving me, and only me, hugs and big, open-mouthed kisses and I can't get enough of them!
  • at 6.5 months (on Easter, actually!) you sat yourself up from laying down

And today, at 6 months and 3 weeks you did the army crawl for the first time AND you said your first word.

And your first word would be....

Dada :)

Oh that Dada of yours. He is kind. He is patient. He is so in love with his third little girl. You melt his heart with every smile and every cuddle you give him. And although you're more of a mama's girl than a daddy's, the moment you see him come home from work may very well be the happiest you look all day! Every single day you great him with an ear to ear toothless smile that's something for the books. And if he walks away those bright brown eyes will follow him wherever he goes. Even though he's not Mommy, he's found his own special way to calm you down when you get upset. If you fuss or cry he will sing "Miss Mia Mack" to you and it calms you down every.single.time. It's awesome. You have managed to steal away a heart that's been stolen 3 other times already. Oh yes, sweetpea, you're that good :).

My sweet girl, of all my girls you are the most attached to mama. So long as you're in my arms, you rarely cry. If you are upset it usually takes little more than my attention to turn your little tears into a smile almost instantly. Even for Daddy, until recently if you were in his arms you were fine as long as you could see me :). I calm you down like nobody else and I'm the sole recipient of your hugs and kisses. How lucky am I that I get to be loved by another one of God's miracles? I couldn't possibly explain to you the blessing that you've been to me, sweetpea. I feel as though you are an extension of me and I of you. This attachment you have to me, it certainly isn't one-sided. You were 10 weeks old before I left the house without you (even only for a couple of hours) and 12 weeks before I could leave you even after you were already in bed for the night. When you cry it hurts me. If you're upset I can't calm down until you're happy. So much of this I know comes from the mama that your sisters have made me - one that's softer and loves like I didn't know was possible. But so much comes from you. You're a sensitive little soul and it's made me a different kind of mama. I don't worry about the "right thing to do" anymore and I don't have my nose glued in a book like I did when you're sisters were babies. My only concern is what's right for you. You teach me every day how to be more patient, more loving, and more present. How lucky I am to have you. How lucky our little family is to have had you for these last 6 beautiful months of your life.

We love you to the moon and back, sweet girl!


Mama xoxo

Monday, October 31, 2011

3...part deux

Our sweet Mia Gabrielle

Born on September 19th, 2011

9 lbs 11 oz ~ 20 inches

And now there are 3 beautiful little girls in our house, in our lives, and in our hearts. And I could not be happier!

She's 6 weeks today so clearly her birth didn't bring with it any kind of miraculous time management skills that would allow me to sit down and actually write on this blog within any kind of reasonable time period ;). Oh wellz...

Our newest little sweetpea, like her sisters, was created with her own share of stubborness and ended up needing a bit of a nudge out of the warm and comfy home she had known for 9 months and into the warm and comfy arms of Mommy and Daddy.

So at 40 weeks and 6 days I was induced. Throughout this entire pregnancy I had committed myself to having the natural birth I had wanted with each of my pregnancies. I was ready. I got informed. I was going to do it. And truth be told, the doctor would've allowed me to wait it out another 4 days. But that was it. And this sweet baby refused to drop. At 40 weeks she wasn't even low enough to have my membranes stripped in the hopes of progressing things. I was 2-3 cm dilated for weeks but this little one refused to scoot down which was keeping my cervix from thinning out. So given the option to be induced just 4 days before the "deadline" and my out of control desire to meet the little caboose that would complete our family, I gave in - with conditions.

Monday morning, September 19th the Mr. and I checked into the hospital. I was like a little girl on Christmas morning. So completely excited. Not nervous at all and 100% ready to meet this sweet baby. BUT I was still holding on to my dream of a natural birth. And so I requested that the doctor break my water in hopes of that getting things moving along. So he agreed - and said he would give me 2 hours. If nothing happened they would start Pitocin (argh!). When he went to break my water I was 3-4 cm and she was still so high that, for a moment, he almost couldn't reach my bag of waters! Sweetpea STILL hadn't dropped! But he did reach it. And so we waited. I could feel my contractions getting a bit more intense but they were completely manageable. When my (awesome) nurse came in to check on me I asked how my contractions looked and she said they were the same as when I had come in. No change! What the?? So at 10:30 on the dot in she came with the bag of pain..err, I mean Pitocin. I asked that she start it very slow so she infused it at only 2 drops an hour. Within minutes the contractions HIT. I won't lie - it was awful. They were on top of each other, leaving me little room to rest between them. They were strong, they were painful, and the were long. I hated it. There was nothing that felt natural about them. They were forced. They felt forced. They took away from what I had wanted to experience and feel. The next two hours went like this...

10:30 - Pitocin started.
11:15 - 5 to 6 cm. Anesthesiologist called.
11:40 - Epidural given.
11:55 - 8 to 9 cm. Dr. Josupait called.
12:25 - The tell me to push half way through a contraction (??? no idea I was about to start pushing. Anthony wasn't even standing next to me!)
12:31 pm - we have a beautiful baby GIRL!

2 hours of active labor. 1.5 really tough hours, the rest not so bad (meds!). Was it what I wanted? Not at all. Do I regret any of it? Not even a moment. At the end of it all we got the only thing that really mattered - a beautiful, healthy baby girl that only God could've created put safely in our arms. At the end of the day I didn't care how she got here. All that mattered was that she was here and we were complete. And so in love.

The last 6 weeks have been unreal. She's so beautiful and sweet and she smells so good! My life has been soooo good for so long time that I honestly had no clue that it could even get this much better. Her sisters are in love with her, her daddy is the most patient I've ever seen him, and I'm pretty sure it was a solid 4 weeks before I put her down, for what that's worth :).

This life with 3 is amazing. And so completely how it was always meant to be.

Sunday, August 28, 2011


In less than 3 weeks I'm due to be the mommy of 3.

In less than 3 weeks I'm due to give birth to my 3rd sweet baby.

In less than 3 weeks I will quite possibly have 3 girls (or my very 1st little boy).

I've been waiting well over 3 years for this sweet baby.

I share a due date with 2 of my friends. All 3 of us are due on the same day. Crazy.

Last week I was supposed to have started my 3rd semester of Nursing School but instead I'll be lucky enough to be spending that time at home with this little one.

It's hard for me to wrap my brain around it - around the idea that I'm so close to seeing this sweet baby's face and meeting the little one that gets the hiccups and break dances inside my belly. When I found out we were pregnant back in January I thought I'd document this entire pregnancy here. And then life happened. School and our business and the Mr. and our busy little girls and 3 solid months of not feeling so hot happened.

And now it's almost here. And I'm so excited I can barely stand it. Come one sweet baby #3, Mommy can't wait to meet you!

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Farewell, 2010

Omgosh it's been so long.

I feel like it seems pointless to make myself any kind of promises or offer up any kind of apologies for not blogging more. I can't do it. I want to do it. But then I don't. And I'm pretty ok with that. I think. And then I come on here and realize I haven't put up a picture of my girls in FOREVER. And I'm not scrapbookin' on this end. And I'm not writin' in any baby/toddler/big girl books all of the hilarious/silly/outrageous things they say. And then it bugs me. And I tell myself I HAVE GOT to get on here more. So we'll see. No promises. No apologies. Just a hope that I'll do it.

Good? Good.

So now. On to my very first post of 2011 {holy crapola. 2011. when in the world did THAT happen?!?!}

A couple year ago I did a recap of my year and, while I thought I had done it every year, apparently it's been a long time - like, over-a-year long time. So here goes - the very best of 2010!

brought new friendships and a feeling of hope for the year. Going into our 2nd year with the new company, things looked promising.

And we took the girls to Florida for the the first time. It was our first vacation as a family and, in a word, Disney World was...MAGICAL. No joke. They don't mess around. Everything is so well done and so incredibly whimsical and, well, magical. Totally deserves it's own post. Ahem...

came with one determined little toddler deciding to give up diapers! Can I get a hollerrr!!! Maddie did so well and she did it when she was ready {in true Maddie fashion}. We celebrated with, what else but a Potty Party :).

oh March. This was a big month for our family. After not getting accepted into the Nursing program last Fall, I got the news that I was accepted into this Fall's program. This is going to change our life. Oh yeah, I don't think I mentioned I decided to go to Nursing School last year ;)

aside from our everyday blessings, I can't think of a milestone. I guess it's the price I pay for not writing stuff down!

in May our sweet, and tough little Maddie turned 3. She wanted a race car party. Yes, my princess wanted a RACE CAR party. But of course, this princess decided on a PINK race car party. THAT I could do. And we did. And it was super fun! Super hot out but super fun.

This was the month that our big girl danced on the big stage for the first time. Ana was the cutest elegant elephant out there {totally unbiased, I swear!}. Tears, people. Tears and tears and tears! It was beautiful :)

June... idea. Please see "April" for explanation :).

well, July brought us the newest member of our family. Little Baby Eva was born on the 19th. Ana and Maddie were THRILLED to have a baby around! Little Eva made Maddie a big cousin for the first time and Ana has oh-so-affectionately dubbed her "Eva the Diva" :).

July also brought me my first 5K. Yeppers! I ran a 5K! I've wondered in the past what exactly people got out of physical challenges and I tell ya, I get it. What a sense of accomplishment I got crossing that finish line! I ran the entire race without walking once and finished it in 32 minutes. Unfortunately, that was pretty much the last time I ran but am absolutely looking forward to my next!

August brought two very big changes. The first was the news that Dana was offered {and accepted} a job too many states away. I won't lie. I don't like not having her here. Even though she's been back twice already it's just different. But it's good for her. Really good, I think. And so this is how it'll be. Til August at least. Maybe longer. Hopefully not.

And I started Nursing School. And leaving the girls with a sitter for the first time {outside of family}. They love it. Dropping them off on the last day of the semester wasn't any easier for me than the first was but there are no words to express how thankful I am for the situation we were handed. Their sitter, Aimee, is one of the kindest people I've ever met. She's so incredibly warm and patient and has taken my girls in like she's known them their entire life. The girls ADORE her, her hubby, their 3 kiddies, and even their big dog, Cherry. How blessed we are that God put them into our life. Dramatic as it may sound, I honestly don't think I could keep going to school if this situation were any different. Thank God for her. Thank God for answered prayers.

our very first baby turned 5. FIVE!!! When did that happen?! And she is every bit of it. Sassy and smart as can be. She keeps us on our toes, cracks us up, and turns me to mush with the love she offers so completely unconditionally. Her big 5th birthday bash was, per request, a red cowgirl party. The weather played a bunch of tricks on us but all in all she loved it!

September also brought the start of a new school year for my sweet girls - Ana's 2nd year and my big girl Maddie's first. I was a mess. But filled with pride. They walked in, hand in hand, and took another step towards independence. An unbelievable mom moment for me, for sure, and one I'll never forget.

and yet another baby was born. Sweet little Dorothy Patricia was born to my sweet friend Sharon. After a worrisome pregnancy, everything was great and that little girl was born as perfect as could be.

an amazing Thanksgiving full of blessings. So many times throughout the year I sit and wonder how we got so lucky - what we did to deserve the enormous blessings we've been given.

amazing. Amazing. A house fuller than ever and seeping with love. A Christmas that just keeps getting better and better each year with these beautiful girls and a revolving door of parties. I loved it. Every second of it. I love that the girls love having our friends and family over. And I love that our friends and family want to be here. Blessed? Sometimes I feel like that's not even a big enough word anymore.

This year was incredible. I saw friend go through a lot of downs but fate never failed to pick them back up. I watched the girls go from being sisters to really becoming friends. I felt the sincerity of true friendship as my life adjusted to the challenges of going to school full-time. I felt our family get closer with the addition of sweet Eva. And I felt our little family of four stronger than ever.

Thank you, 2010. For everything you've given us this year and the hope you're sending us into 2011 with. So incredibly thankful. And so incredibly looking forward to what 2011 will bring.

Happy New Year!!!

me :)

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Once more..

And I'm back! Two days in a row! Why? To win somethin'! I told ya...

Yep, I can win one of these babies from here! and here and here aaaand here :)

Monday, November 22, 2010


What a bad blogger, I know.

BUT offer me the chance to win something and that'll sure get me on here!

Fingers crossed that this beauty become M.I.N.E!!

I could win one of these from HERE or even HERE!!!

Friday, September 10, 2010

Overwhelmed Much?

Full school schedule
Full homework schedule
Girls' dance class
Girls' preschool 3 days a week
Junior Women's Club at church
Volunteer cook for Daybreak
Sunday School
My two little ladies
One husband that works too much to do much around the house
A house to clean
4 mouths to feed
Grocery shopping to do
Friends to keep in touch with
Family to visit with
A best friend to miss :(...

What in the world have I gotten myself into...

Tomorrow's another day but today...well, today I am wondering how I'll do it all.