Farewell, 2010

Omgosh it's been so long.

I feel like it seems pointless to make myself any kind of promises or offer up any kind of apologies for not blogging more. I can't do it. I want to do it. But then I don't. And I'm pretty ok with that. I think. And then I come on here and realize I haven't put up a picture of my girls in FOREVER. And I'm not scrapbookin' on this end. And I'm not writin' in any baby/toddler/big girl books all of the hilarious/silly/outrageous things they say. And then it bugs me. And I tell myself I HAVE GOT to get on here more. So we'll see. No promises. No apologies. Just a hope that I'll do it.

Good? Good.

So now. On to my very first post of 2011 {holy crapola. 2011. when in the world did THAT happen?!?!}

A couple year ago I did a recap of my year and, while I thought I had done it every year, apparently it's been a long time - like, over-a-year long time. So here goes - the very best of 2010!

January...
brought new friendships and a feeling of hope for the year. Going into our 2nd year with the new company, things looked promising.

And we took the girls to Florida for the the first time. It was our first vacation as a family and, in a word, Disney World was...MAGICAL. No joke. They don't mess around. Everything is so well done and so incredibly whimsical and, well, magical. Totally deserves it's own post. Ahem...


February...
came with one determined little toddler deciding to give up diapers! Can I get a hollerrr!!! Maddie did so well and she did it when she was ready {in true Maddie fashion}. We celebrated with, what else but a Potty Party :).

March...
oh March. This was a big month for our family. After not getting accepted into the Nursing program last Fall, I got the news that I was accepted into this Fall's program. This is going to change our life. Oh yeah, I don't think I mentioned I decided to go to Nursing School last year ;)

April...
aside from our everyday blessings, I can't think of a milestone. I guess it's the price I pay for not writing stuff down!

May...
in May our sweet, and tough little Maddie turned 3. She wanted a race car party. Yes, my princess wanted a RACE CAR party. But of course, this princess decided on a PINK race car party. THAT I could do. And we did. And it was super fun! Super hot out but super fun.

This was the month that our big girl danced on the big stage for the first time. Ana was the cutest elegant elephant out there {totally unbiased, I swear!}. Tears, people. Tears and tears and tears! It was beautiful :)


June...
June...June...June...no idea. Please see "April" for explanation :).


July...
well, July brought us the newest member of our family. Little Baby Eva was born on the 19th. Ana and Maddie were THRILLED to have a baby around! Little Eva made Maddie a big cousin for the first time and Ana has oh-so-affectionately dubbed her "Eva the Diva" :).

July also brought me my first 5K. Yeppers! I ran a 5K! I've wondered in the past what exactly people got out of physical challenges and I tell ya, I get it. What a sense of accomplishment I got crossing that finish line! I ran the entire race without walking once and finished it in 32 minutes. Unfortunately, that was pretty much the last time I ran but am absolutely looking forward to my next!


August...
August brought two very big changes. The first was the news that Dana was offered {and accepted} a job too many states away. I won't lie. I don't like not having her here. Even though she's been back twice already it's just different. But it's good for her. Really good, I think. And so this is how it'll be. Til August at least. Maybe longer. Hopefully not.

And I started Nursing School. And leaving the girls with a sitter for the first time {outside of family}. They love it. Dropping them off on the last day of the semester wasn't any easier for me than the first was but there are no words to express how thankful I am for the situation we were handed. Their sitter, Aimee, is one of the kindest people I've ever met. She's so incredibly warm and patient and has taken my girls in like she's known them their entire life. The girls ADORE her, her hubby, their 3 kiddies, and even their big dog, Cherry. How blessed we are that God put them into our life. Dramatic as it may sound, I honestly don't think I could keep going to school if this situation were any different. Thank God for her. Thank God for answered prayers.

September...
our very first baby turned 5. FIVE!!! When did that happen?! And she is every bit of it. Sassy and smart as can be. She keeps us on our toes, cracks us up, and turns me to mush with the love she offers so completely unconditionally. Her big 5th birthday bash was, per request, a red cowgirl party. The weather played a bunch of tricks on us but all in all she loved it!

September also brought the start of a new school year for my sweet girls - Ana's 2nd year and my big girl Maddie's first. I was a mess. But filled with pride. They walked in, hand in hand, and took another step towards independence. An unbelievable mom moment for me, for sure, and one I'll never forget.

October...
and yet another baby was born. Sweet little Dorothy Patricia was born to my sweet friend Sharon. After a worrisome pregnancy, everything was great and that little girl was born as perfect as could be.

November...
an amazing Thanksgiving full of blessings. So many times throughout the year I sit and wonder how we got so lucky - what we did to deserve the enormous blessings we've been given.

December...
amazing. Amazing. A house fuller than ever and seeping with love. A Christmas that just keeps getting better and better each year with these beautiful girls and a revolving door of parties. I loved it. Every second of it. I love that the girls love having our friends and family over. And I love that our friends and family want to be here. Blessed? Sometimes I feel like that's not even a big enough word anymore.



This year was incredible. I saw friend go through a lot of downs but fate never failed to pick them back up. I watched the girls go from being sisters to really becoming friends. I felt the sincerity of true friendship as my life adjusted to the challenges of going to school full-time. I felt our family get closer with the addition of sweet Eva. And I felt our little family of four stronger than ever.

Thank you, 2010. For everything you've given us this year and the hope you're sending us into 2011 with. So incredibly thankful. And so incredibly looking forward to what 2011 will bring.

Happy New Year!!!

xoxo,
me :)

Thankful

Today I am thankful for the big, squishy, attitude-y, stinkerella, funny, loveable, huggable character that is our Maddie.


She's that little bit of spice that every life needs.


She's that whole lot of attitude that keeps us in check.


And she's the lovebug that can lift up our hearts without warning.

Not in a million years could I have ordered up a little girl so perfectly cut out for our little family.

I promise you I thank God for her every single day.

Tough

Being a mom is tough.

Being surrounded by fits and "no"s and "she hit me"s and "mine"s is tough.

Being mistaken for a jungle gym and getting a finger in the eye or a foot to the cheek almost daily is tough.

Having to keep your cool when your two little wonders decide that doing the exact opposite of what you tell them would be hilarious is tough.

And hearing your two-year-old tell you to leave her alone for the first time is really, really tough.

And then your 3-year-old writes her name all by herself for the first time.

And your 2-year-old goes on the potty for the first time.

And you get to lay in bed with your two little girls reading story after story while they hold hands and the 3-year-old rubs your head and whispers "I'm the happiest girl in the world, Mommy."

Then it becomes a whole lot of easy and you wonder what you were ever complaining about.

Chit Chattin' with Maddie

As I sang and sang and sang...

Maddie: "Nuff, Mommy! Enough!"

:(

Chit Chattin' with Ana...and Maddie

Waiting for the girls to clean up their toys so we can go for a walk...

Mama: "Girls, clean up your toys now or we're not going for a walk. I mean it!"

Ana: "OK, Moooom. You just go get the stroller ready and we'll clean this up. OK? OKKK????

How old is this kid anyway???


After asking Maddie to bring me something she (finally) brings it...

Mama: "Thank you, baby."

Maddie: "Noooooo problem!"

hehehehehehehehe....

Happy 2nd Birthday, Little Miss Maddie

Oh my sweet girl.

You're two now and I don't even know where to start. In three words, you are, LARGER THAN LIFE. Everything about you is larger than life - your temper, your personality, your sense of humor, your love of everything. You throw the biggest fit over the tiniest things and you get the most excited over the simplest joys. I love that about you so. much.

I know you're mine, and this may sound biased, but I think you're the funniest 2-year-old I've ever known. You have a character that blows our minds every single day. You're mean to your sister but she's the first one you ask for every morning. You absolutely refuse to hold Mommy's hand when you walk but I can't get through making dinner without you tugging at my legs begging to be held. You love Daddy like nothing I've ever seen and scream in delight at the sight of him at the end of each day.

You're two and know exactly what you want. You push my buttons like no other 30-lb chunk of love ever has and you swell my heart even more. I love you, sweet girl. I love you like you'll never know...well, until you have a perfect little girl of your own. It's been a wild, crazy, and full two years. Thank you, baby, for choosing me to be your mom. Thank you for letting me hold your hand (figuratively of course :)) through these past two years. You're a gift to me and to our little family, Petunia, and I could never imagine our life without you.

Happy 2nd Birthday, Madelyn Grace. I love you.

xoxo,
Mama

Chit Chattin' with Maddie

I sat Maddie in her carseat and as I was going to put Ana in hers I sat her on Maddie's lap for a second (you know, cuz I'm soooo funny)...

Maddie: "Move it, Ana! Move it!!!"

Yep, sounds about right. All Maddie.

Chit Chattin' with Maddie: the Debut

Is it really happening? Can I really start publishing "Chit Chattin' with Maddie" posts???? It can't be. My baby can't be getting this big!

Oh but she is. And this is her first...sigh (you know, a sad but proud and happy but reluctant-to-let-go kind of sigh).

While trying to draw on the wall with an unsharpened pencil...

Mama: "Maddie, what are you doing?"

Maddie: "Na-ting, Mama. Na-ting."

Mama: "We only color on paper, remember?"

Maddie: "No, Mama, no 'member."

Oh boy.

Our Dancing Queen

Oh Maddie...

You're counting to 7 unassisted, 11 with help. You count to 4 in Spanish, 9 with help. You know your colors and most of your shapes. And you talk, talk, talk. Some of our favorites are:

"Help me, Mama!" when you want up, down, out, in, whatever.
"Bless you, Mama."
"Here!" when you hand things to us.
"Doing, Dada?" when you want to know what he's doing.
"Matter, Mama?" if you think I'm upset.
"Here I am!" when I call you.
"Wait!!!!" of "Para!!!" if I walk away.
"Miiiissed you!"
"I yuv you" - all. the. time.
"Morning, Mama."
"Coming, Ana!" when you're in your crib and you hear Ana.

I love you more every single day.

Happy 18 months (plus 2)

Madelyn Grace,

This is your 18 month letter.

You're 20 months and 8 days old today.

This has seemed to be the theme of our entire life together.

One day you're 18 months old and the next it's 2 months later. One day I'm holding you for the very first time and the next your running up to me screaming "I yuv you!" You're moving and growing at the speed of light and I'm trying as hard as I can to hold on and enjoy the ride because let me tell you, little girl, what a ride it has already been.

You are so much in one tiny, chubby-faced little package - so much attitude, so much character, so much sweetness.

You play hard - very hard. You throw your weight around like nobody's business and continuously remind everyone who's boss. You take things from your sister. Actually, you often don't even want something until Ana has it. You're stronger than you know and Mommy, Daddy, and Ana are usually the ones to pay the price for that. You love it when Daddy tackles you and see his time on the floor as an opportunity to tackle him back, usually when he's not expecting it. You don't do well with being told no and will instantly drop your head, stick out those lips, and burrow your little brows. You love to say no and will repeatedly say "down!" while someone holds you until they oblige. In fact, Auntie Dana still thinks that's the only word you can say. HA!

It's true that you are a force to be reckoned with, my girl, but even as hard as you play, you love even harder. You're like a walking lovebug. You can't see me kiss Ana without puckering up for your own. You wake up yelling for your sister and start your day with a big hug for her each morning. You love it when I kiss your hands, your feet, your cheeks, your lips. You spontaneously burst into fits of hugs and kisses throughout each day. You say please, thank you, welcome, and bless you without being asked. You love to be surrounded by everyone you love, you always have. When Daddy walks into the garage it's "where Daddy?". When I go into the other room I return the the sweetest "Mommyyyyyyy!!!!!" in the world. I often wonder how that enoromous heart fits in your little 31 inch body.

You count to 3. You LOVE to dance. You've got moves we've never seen on a 1-year-old. You love music. You think you're hilarious. You know the first 2 parts of a knock-knock joke and are working on the punchline. You don't sit down for a full book but love to bring them to us to start them. You understand EVERYTHING. You try to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle" and get a lot of the words right. You love your sister and think she's the funniest person in your life. You call your bear your "baby". You need your "sock on" first thing in the morning. You'll eat pretty much anything. You are so cuddly. You go nonstop. You have crazy hair that can look perfect one day and untamable the next. You're belly needs to wear a 2T but your little legs still need 18 months. You've scared me to no end. I lost track of the words you can say months ago. You use 3-word, and now 4-word sentences. You are dramatic. You are our sunshine.

You are amazing.

And you have filled up my life.

Happy 18 months (plus 2), sweet girl. Mama loves you.

XOXO

You at 18 months.

You now with your sister and your crazy hair :).

So big

"Let me down, NOW!!!" - Maddie's first four word sentence. And totally Maddie-worthy, if I may say so myself :).

Payback

Today at lunch my mom took yet another three opportunities to point out YET AGAIN that what goes around, comes around.

See, ever since our vivacious, super stubborn, high-spirited, animated Miss Maddie came into our lives my mom has just loved to remind me that payback is a bitch (or in her words, "a b-b"). For every time Maddie throws a fit, and with it whatever is in her hand, my mom has some old Spanish saying to throw at me. And with each pout of the lips and throw to the floor Maddie puts out, my mom has a "life lesson" to add - a reminder that this is my payback.

Is it?

Is it "payback" to have a little girl that FILLS UP OUR LIVES? That makes us LAUGH UNTIL OUR BELLIES HURT AND SOMETHING COMES OUT OUR NOSE? Is having a baby that LIGHTS UP A ROOM WITH HER INFECTIOUS LAUGH AND GORGEOUS EYES what's "coming around"? Am I supposed to be feeling some kind of punishment by having a daughter that WON'T LET ANYONE MESS WITH HER? That LAUGHS SO HARD SHE FALLS DOWN? And that KEEPS US ON OUR TOES?

Is this payback? Well, if it is, then I invite you just keep bringing it on, sweet payback because here I am. Arms wide open.

Yep, she's this tough...

And this unbelievably sweet.

Totally Random

Picked up from 4 Little Men & Girly Twins, here is the 21st picture from my May 2007 folder. The one from 2008 was a picture of the floor that my photographer-in-the-making Miss Ana took so I thought it'd be best to go to the year before :).

This picture was taken a couple of hours after we brought our sweet Madelyn Grace into this world. And here we are 19 months later. Geez...

First Snow Day

Last week I finally took the girls out to play in the snow. Finally, the weather, the snow, the day all lined up perfectly and we went out to enjoy.


Maddie's first snow adventure!

The girls LOVED it!

Maddie got her car stuck :)

And Ana made snow angels...

Christmas 2008

What a beautiful Christmas we had!

A little celebration with the girls' bestest friends...

Christmas Eve with my side of the family...

Christmas Day at our house...

A Christmas celebration the following Saturday at our house with Anthony's side...

And another celebration with the girls' aunties and Uncle Dan...

Our Christmas was full, full, FULL. It was full of parties; full of thought-filled gifts; full of laughs and memories; and full of love. We are so blessed!

Scared

This was our sweet girl on Monday at about 4 in the morning. After what started as a normal Sunday night, our little Maddie woke up and had a seizure.

She had been fighting what I thought was Croup for a couple of days. Anthony put her to bed on Sunday night with a runny nose, a cough, and not much more. At about 12:45 am she woke up crying and with a fever. I gave her some Tylenol, changed her diaper and sat down to rock her. As we sat there and rocked her breathing began to strain and I felt her little body start to shake. I looked at her face and my heart sank. She was unresponsive as she stared up to the ceiling. My baby girl was having a seizure.

I ran to our room and laid her on our bed as Anthony and I frantically tried to gain her attention. Her breathing stayed heavy while her body stiffened and her legs and arms shook until suddenly she looked at me. And her breathing stopped. Completely. There she lay, mouth open, staring in my eyes without a sound. As I went to put my mouth to hers she gasped and began to breathe once again. Her body relaxed and she seemed to be coming out it.

Fast forward about 15 minutes and an ambulance ride to the hospital later...

They took her temperature and said it was 104 and guessed that it had likely reached 105 or 106. The outcome of such a rapid increase in temp was a febrile seizure. A chest x-ray reveled pneumonia in her right lung. Some blood tests showed an increase in her white blood cell count. And a spinal tap showed clear fluid that ruled out anything more.

5 hours after we had arrived, just my baby and I, we were on our way home.

Those are the facts. What happened. But this event has far from left us.

This has been, by far, the hardest and scariest thing I've ever experienced as a mom. Standing there completely helpless as my little girl, my baby seized while I could do nothing more than wait. Watching her and praying for God to take her in His hands and protect her. Waiting for what seemed like a lifetime to hear her take another breath. Realizing even for a moment that she could actually NOT be OK. Standing by her side as they had to try 3 separate times to insert an IV and wiping away the endless tears that fell from her eyes. Praying for God to wrap His arms around her when I wasn't allowed to. Having to look in her eyes and try my damnedest to reassure her it would be OK. Sitting idly by while 2 nurses lay on top of her so the doctor could do a spinal tab on her tiny body. This is all that surrounded the "facts" of these 6 hours.

As much as I would love to say that I was a rock through this all I cannot. All of this was almost too much for this very weak mama to take. I felt inadequate. I feel inadequate. Like I should have handled things better. Like I should be so strong as to not cry while I sit here and type this or as to not cry each time the image of her helpless body enters my mind. I've never felt so small, so insignificant, as I did that morning. I remember thinking while all this was going on that this was out of my hands. I kept thinking that I had to trust that the Lord would keep her safe. And though I've always believed myself to be a faithful person I never thought I'd be capable of such surrender in a situation that involved the well-being of my babies. But it was in this very situation that God showed Himself to us and protected our sweet girl.

The pneumonia will be treated with some antibiotics and the seizure is, in all accounts, benign. Though her chances of having another have now increased, they don't cause any damage and she will outgrow them. It amazes me how resilient my little girl can be. When I asked the doctor after Maddie's spinal tap if she would be sore he laughed and said "Oh no. Babies are superior creatures to us adults. She won't remember or even care about this when it's over." And he was right. By the time Anthony and Ana picked us up our little fighter was happy as ever - asking for milk and saying "Hi, Daddy" about a hundred times in our 3 minute drive home. She was fine by morning and she's fine now. I, on the other hand, will just pray for my heart to heal and make me a better mama for having gotten through this.

It's funny how you think you could possibly love them anymore until...

Bananas

"Time for my daily banana..."

"You don't stand a chance against me, Banana!"

"Mmmmmm...poor Banana never saw it comin'."

And remember Ana's "Banana Episode"? I guess it's the bananas???

Survived

We survived the week! It was jam-packed but I made it (and on VERY little sleep, mind you!). I'd love to write all about it but Christmas Eve is knockin' on my door and I have a couch full of projects that are calling to be done! I do have an entire list of stuff I want to write about so, to help keep me honest, I think I'll go ahead and list some of them.

• Maddie's 18 month letter (yes, I KNOW she's almost 19 months!)
• the great Christmas things we've done this past week
• an update on the ol' fat tracker (sneak peek - this week was not great but it wasn't awful either)
• a post inspired by something I read about marriage (deep, just wait)
• a letter to another certain someone I'm seem to kinda fancy these days :)
• some "Chit Chattin' with Ana" updates - there are SOOOO many!!!
  

So I'll do my best to write it all while it's still fresh but this week is going to be another doozy!!! Is that even the right word!?!? Anyhoo, with my mom's birthday, our annual girls' tamale night, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, my bff's birthday, and a Christmas celebration with Anthony's side of the family, and another celebrating my awesome friends I'm sure I'll totally get to it :).

Until soooon!

Two little bunnies...

Ana at 18 months...

Maddie at 17 months...